Friday, June 6, 2014

Mommy camp 2014 #funforFriday

I don't have the stamina for this this year!

I must simply record all the ways I try to entertain these children monkeys in between school days and camp days. 

In years past I had a lot more of these and somehow they seemed to be a lot easier! 

I don't know if they expect me to be as attentive as their preschool teachers or if I have just lost my touch over this past year. I'm no longer able to get little tasks done without offering a bribe of some sort. This must be a systemic problem. 

Day 1: Yay! It's summer! Let's get outside!
Ahhhh....summertime
Tyler arboretum starting at 9 am and going until about 2 pm...Alternate carrying kids back to entrance and dragging them by their sweaty neckholes.
Crash for a movie: Brave, while mommy works on Etsy orders.
Run out to Kindergarten Orientation/Playdate. Meltdowns ensue. Times three.
Calm nerves for an hour (both mommy and kids) by playing outside with neighbors.
Throw dinner together.
Throw bedtime together.

Day 2: Wow! It's still summer! Let's get outside and learn new things from mommy!
Start off at 6:50 am straight into a game of Busytown
We like to use our own game pieces
Kids yoga. Spend 20 minutes finding video, give up and use a YouTube video; spend 20 minutes alternating explaining why we are using this video instead of our favorite and actually trying to do yoga. 
Craft some fairies that no five year old would ever be able to do alone with string, beads, glue, cardboard cutouts from a paper set the little girl got for Christmas, explain for 10 minutes how the 'treehouse' part of it must be lost because I threw it away in a messy heap about three weeks after it was received.
Reading exercises after kindergarten orientation panic.
Check garden for weeds, caterpillars, blooms and vegetable possibilities.
Hot, sweaty playground play for about 2 hours.
Wegman's.
Crash for a movie: Finding Nemo.
Prepare lovely dinner from fresh groceries.

On the third day she rose again in fulfillment of the...wait what?: Meltdown city
At this point I wasn't even brewing fresh coffee, I was literally heating up 2-day-old coffee. Not a good sign. Coffee: fail.
Yoga with our fave video Daddy found for us the night before. We muscled through.
More reading exercises as kindergarten panic continues to grow.
Bear Hunt: all was well until we started getting wet.
Shhh....don't tell mommy we're about to get wet.
Hit Staples for mommy's business cards: fail.
Make up gymnastics class: ok.
Two-for-one frozen yogurt: MAJOR fail.
Hit Staples for mommy's business cards a second time: half fail.
Crash for movie: fail.
Beg to hit the pool. Sign up for swim lessons for Mommy Camp Week #2: Win. The boy scrapes knees upon entering pool and proceeds to cry for twenty minutes while I continue to change band-aids every time he wants to 'look' at boo-boos. Leave. Pool: fail.
Throw dinner together, but not enough for Daddy because it's looking like he's not going to make it home for bedtime. He calls during clean-up. Dinner: fail. Rant on phone: fail.
Rant when he arrives home: fail.
FAIL. FAIL. FAIL.

Day 4: Let's slow that roll for a bit
Ahhhhh....coming together....
Sewing orders for mommy while kids ransacked toys in cabinet.
Legends of Chima marathon while mommy continues sewing.
Reading exercises a third time to assuage guilt from Chima marathon.
Play outside on swingset while mommy gets it together to leave the house.
Have lovely late lunch together at Zoe's, eat real food with bribes.
Last gymnastics class: great.
Home to crash....but decide we want to hit pool....wait a sec...

It was by Thursday of this week that I finally realized the secret to my earlier successes: a third cup of coffee in the afternoon. Well, of course! Yes, naturally. That acid reflux isn't going to flare itself. And that bedtime dance party's gotta come from somewhere. I swear my kids are going to associate dancing with quarter end somehow. It will certainly affect their career choices.

It reminded me of my addiction to crack cocaine and how much that has served me in life. Certainly a little sneak-week wasn't gonna get me off track or anything...

Cue Hallelujah chorus while sipping an afternoon cupa Joe. Actually cue Bach's Coffee Cantata.

So....we head to the pool and swim laps! Lots and lots of laps! And we are amazing swimmers.  Laps for the girl in the big pool (this is HUGE; she cannot stand in that water), laps for the boy in the medium pool (this is a cute attempt to be like sis.)
Check out that intensity. Check out that hair bow.
And it is not really that cold. And our boo-boo's don't hurt anymore. And we can do the big pool AND the medium pool. And we can get home a little on the late side because we ate lunch a little on the late side and...

We get home. And dinner gets started. And Daddy is on his way home and is starving and there is enough for him too! And everything is great. And coffee is such a wonderful thing. And Daddy wants to hit the range after bedtime...oh? Daddy wants to hit the range instead of bedtime? No problem! I've got this.

Oh but then I start having delusions of grandeur again...the Ironman always lingers...the great American musical....the great American novel...the Texas Lone Star quilt in honor of my grandfather...

Who said I was a great American anyways? I'm just a great. mommy.

Today is Day 5
let's go for broke and hit Dutch Wonderland and the Zoo. Mama's got the lock on some hot Columbian brew...

Daddy works so hard for our money. We should really enjoy it. Especially when he listens to my rants and why I'm so tired and responds:

"This is your JOB! I don't want to hear how hard it is!"

Does that, work in reverse? 
Actually we are having breakfast on the patio while mommy blogs.
HAPPY FRIDAY FOLKS! LET'S GET THIS SUMMER STARTED RIGHT AND BE SURE TO TIP YOUR FAVORITE COLUMBIANS.






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