Sunday, January 6, 2013

What to do when a mutual friend of the ex-friend invites you both out to lunch

1. Be honest.
Explain to her what went down without getting ghetto.
Plus: you get to tell your side of the story.
Minus: you have to re-live the story, rather than moving on like you already did.

2. Find a graceful way to bow out.
Plus: plausible deniability.
Minus: no one will know what a classy broad you are.

3. Not respond at all.
Plus: plausible deniability, or getting promoted to permanent flake status.
Minus: you may be furthering any rumors that may have preempted the invite anyway.

4. Show up and live your life out loud.
Plus: you get to be you.
Minus: you have to spend time with the ex.

5. Blog about it to see if someone else has a better idea.
Plus: you give up control to a higher being.
Minus: that higher being may be spam.

It's been a long time at #2, and I'm growing weary of being a grown-up.

So I'm going with #5.

13 comments:

  1. Be honest with the friend who invited you. Skip the lunch and go out and get a mani-pedi!

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    Replies
    1. Sounds like a VERY nice alternative!! :)

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  2. Why? Negative energy (thinking about doing it) on top of negative energy (the original break-up).

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    Replies
    1. Sure, say thanks but no thanks. Out of mind.

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  3. # 1 sounds like a way to stop any further invitations. You don't have to badmouth Ex Friend, just explain why you're not interested in being around E.F. any long. For example, instead of saying E.F. stabbed you, you can voice your concern that E.F. isn't responsible with knives.
    If this isn't the first invitation, either Mutual Friend has no idea you've got a problem with E.F., or M.F. think the relationship is fixable and getting you and E.F. together is step one. Being honest would ensure it won't be the former and dismiss the possibility of the latter.

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    Replies
    1. I'm so tempted- don't know if I can control myself if I start to let it all hang out!!

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  4. Oh, I am a wimp so I was totally going to say number 2. :P

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  5. Bobt has it right. #2 and move on, no explanation required.

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    Replies
    1. Ugh. You know hubby thinks 'be honest.' But what does he know! :b

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  6. Bobt has it right. #2 and move on, no explanation required.

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  7. depends on what happened. forgivable and worth rescuing? go with 4. no way ever again with nothing to lose? go with 2. I wouldn't waste my time with someone I want nothing to do with.

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